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.: My Own Worst Enemy :. by Cataclysm-X .: My Own Worst Enemy :. by Cataclysm-X
We are our own worst enemy.

I wonder what people think of me...

Evil: as if they care
Good: they always do
Evil: you're not unique, copycat!

But I just like to draw things and stuff.

Evil: you're not even original!
Good: at least you enjoy what you do

Right... :)

Evil: but you won't accomplish anything in life with drawing

Oh... :(

Evil: you suck major a$$!!! hahahaha
Good: that's not true. You can draw and create things lots of other people will never be able to do.

Could be... but what if-

Good: Shush! Don't bring yourself down like that. You're making yourself sick. :no:
Evil: but you already are
Good: you know what I mean
Evil: sure, as if talking to yourself is healthy

I'm losing my mind here...

Evil: Mission accomplished
Good: Stay strong...

No matter how secure someone may seem to be, there's always one person who can make you the most insecure and weakest person on the entire planet... And that person is you.

I've had a lot of self esteem issues. It made me doubt about who I am. About what I can do. It makes me feel sick.

Luckily I got a lot more stronger and don't give a crap about what people think of me, but still... there will always be someone who can make me feel bad. But I try not to give in. :)

(That's why I always try to stay optimistic and make other people happy as well!)

Anyway, there are symbols in this drawing that represent good and evil. Or at least it represents opposites of things. Good can be evil and vice versa if you don't know how to handle these things in life.

I tried to colour the drawing but yeah... I'm not very good at that :hmm:

And it was weird drawing myself differently x) but that's another story. I've had enough of myself for now lol.

Stuff used
  • 2H, H, HB, B, 2B 0.5mm mechanical pencils

  • tissue and tortillions for blending

  • my own pictures

  • imagination

  • kneaded + pencil eraser

  • A4 Hahnemühle Nostalgie sketchbook paper

  • Photoshop for coloring :noes:

  • Time spent: too much! I don't like drawing my own face xD
    Add a Comment:
    mlp-deviant Featured By Owner Nov 17, 2015  Hobbyist Artist
    Love this ! €•€
    kloe-oki Featured By Owner Jun 6, 2015
    Beautiful :) I love it and the idea is perfect  
    NyuSonozaky Featured By Owner Apr 11, 2015  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
    So awesome ! Expressive and beautiful!
    GreenlandsGirl Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
    So true!!
    Amazing drawing! :D
    RainingBrokenTeacups Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
    Wow thia is amazing!
    KevyMetal Featured By Owner Aug 13, 2013  Professional General Artist
    Good work and cool. B-)
    LeeKwoonFai Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
    So beautiful <3
    ForsakenPoet Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013
    i can so relate
    Sviree Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
    Truly inspiring :)

    Great work!
    HannaKarlsson Featured By Owner Nov 10, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
    Awesome work!!
    Oxidizer25 Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2012
    ...and that's why we have friends to prove our good side right whenever we start listening to our evil one ;P
    SuperBarass Featured By Owner Jun 9, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
    i relate. even though i stink at drawing and your awesome at it.


    Well it isn`t my fault I`m not like you! I just am this way you can`t do anything because if i go down your coming with me!
    SakonX Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2012
    You're amazing.
    GabKun727 Featured By Owner Apr 14, 2012
    Great job!!! Really cool sly and evil impression coming from your bad side.
    Omnipah Featured By Owner Apr 10, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
    This is awesome :D
    Shady-Lady90 Featured By Owner Jan 16, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
    love it and i love the meaning behind the pic.....totally understand the feeling of being insecure
    Hollie97 Featured By Owner Nov 30, 2011
    amazing!! :heart:
    fightchick Featured By Owner Nov 12, 2011
    really great!
    jefrelaw Featured By Owner Oct 28, 2011
    pxiestx99 Featured By Owner Oct 18, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
    i absolutely love this!
    MARX-MAN Featured By Owner Sep 1, 2011  Professional Artist
    It is almost a waste of time for me to say anything about this piece.

    Artistically: It anchors itself effectively to the theme and puts it's message across in a way which is easy for the audience to decode. It contains a bag full of clichés including the oldest one; the dichotomy of good and evil, however, the execution is proficient enough for that to be forgiven.

    Unlike many works depicting the aforementioned dichotomy of Good and Evil, I find the subtle subversion of expectation interesting as well as personally irksome, traditionally it is the devil character is the one that whispers in the ear of the protagonist as they look to the angel for guidance as the angel sits quietly, confident that the protagonist will do the right thing. This image has the protagonist looking to the "evil" character whilst the "good" character whispers in the ear. Although some would argue that religion has done more damage than good and that it is the angel character that should be portrayed as evil, I cannot escape the classic anchors that the audience will identify, which states that this is seemingly backward, although I would suppose that speaks volumes about the character. That she openly looks to the bad side but is secretly good. The classic anti-hero.

    The Yin and Yang just confuses things a little more in the classic sense, as the Light and Dark sides don't match with the Devil and Angel characters positioning, unless the artist thinks that the Devil character is good and the Angel character is bad in which case it adds more depth to the character, perhaps she thinks the bad is good and the good is bad, perhaps she focuses on negativity as an important part of life and positivity as a detriment to herself, it would be an effective parody of one particular human condition; that doubts the praise because it sees it's own faults.

    The character sizes should also be noted. The emphasis is mostly placed on the middle character through colouring, however, because the devil character is the tallest and is looking back to the protagonist, the eye gets left in the middle of the two, which is a bit of a waste of directionality but like most things in this image it is easily forgiven.

    There is a lot to say about the small technical errors that I am sure people have pointed out:
    - The dots on the Yin-Yang not being placed correctly.
    - The pencil to the left appearing to be slightly off.
    - The papers angles slightly altering and twisting the perspective of the table.

    - There is a distinct lack of dramatic lighting, it is very much a neutral image. You could have placed the emphasis on the characters traits through use of lighting, for example; very dramatic shadowing on the evil character and highlights on the good character with shafts of light to direct the eye to elements in the scene, just to give them some extra umph, however, that aspect is a consideration for future pieces.

    All the little irksome problems with the form don't really subtract from the function, which despite the classical things that bug me, like the inverted roles, they don't really subtract from the characters or the interaction and in fact they can be read into and add a great deal of depth, which is why I say they are interesting as well as irksome to me.

    With that said I must turn my attention to the title and description, as they are an important part of any work.

    The title: My own worst enemy.
    As it stands by itself, it obviously conjures a notion that you are against yourself.
    When combined with the imagery it makes the inversion of the characters make a lot more sense, the whole; looking to the negative side becomes more obvious.

    The description: Is a lot of things, it informs the image, it almost puts too much in the mix, like adding too much sugar to a cup of tea, too much can spoil something. The description hammers the concept in a remarkably blunt way. In an almost literal sense, it's the artist telling the audience what the image means, which I find, in a way; undermines you as an artist and insults the audiences intellect. In the words of the Robot Devil from Futurama: "You can't just have your characters announce how they feel! That makes me feel angry!".
    Whilst, in a way, it has that effect of undermining you as an artist, because the piece is called: "My own worst enemy".
    It actually does the piece a whole lot more justice than I give it credit for, because there are levels to the undermining on both conceptual and actual levels, it's legitimately difficult to tell whether or not this was added on purpose to demonstrate the undermining effect you have on yourself or if you added it with the purpose to make it appear that way and either way it informs the image for people who don't understand so in a way, you couldn't really loose out by adding it in. It was a win-win scenario.

    In summary; The image is effective, the flaws are forgiveable, the characters have the correct form in large and the anchors work well. There is a lot that could be added to this image to make it pack more punch or add a great deal more drama but as it stands it is adequate for the job and evidently a lot of people enjoyed this image.

    In conclusion; You shouldn't be so hard on yourself, having looked through your work and I can tell you have a keen eye for realism which most people would envy and you should be proud of what you have achieved.
    The image is enjoyable and can be read into, which is more than what can be said of a lot of works on this site.
    ston3wond3rcl0ud Featured By Owner Aug 28, 2011
    Cool :)
    autogestion Featured By Owner Aug 20, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
    nice introspection
    i think you ve long earned your respect here though
    but when in doubt judge others instead of letting them judge you ;)
    HTFlover013 Featured By Owner Jul 12, 2011
    Wow, this picture is simply amazing!
    Happy-Gothic-Lover Featured By Owner Jul 1, 2011  Student Writer
    I can relate to this ALOT. My evil just seems to talk much more than the good :)
    Veniae Featured By Owner May 8, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
    I can't even begin to express how much I like this picture. Amazing!
    EpicDreamer2011 Featured By Owner Apr 23, 2011  Student Digital Artist
    This is a very interesting picture- I think we can all relate to it sometimes. It's also very nicely drawn, colored, and shaded.
    Wingracer Featured By Owner Apr 14, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
    How cool!!! I love this image.:)
    Omegadbz Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
    liked the drawing and the "GOOD EVIL" thing
    Yuiko101 Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
    Awesome representation of inner insecurities. I have the exact same thoughts sometimes =)
    Dark-In-Light Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2011
    Lol. looks like people got into a little fight on your page (yes I have a habbit of reading comments o.o). First of you're a very beautiful individual.(psst. no one likes to draw themselves :p unless they're egotistical, then they do ><) Ienjoyed the slight backgorund story that you added, you did indeed portray your idea very well. I also thought the fact taht you only colored you yourself and not your two opposing sides. So good job :D

    (Fun Fact: Did you know that in certain cultures the white part of the ying-yang symbolizes darkness or evil and the dark side symbolizes good. Theres soem big background story to it but yeah >< )
    Cataclysm-X Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2011  Professional Traditional Artist
    people always need something to complain about. I've heard people complaining about not being original and, when I did create something from memory, people say the quality ain't good enough compared to my realism works. But you know, in the end it's about what I find so important about art: the fun I have and the creativity I experience. It's a bonus other people enjoy what I create :) no matter if it's 1 person or a 1000 of them.

    Thank you for your sweet and informative comment! I didn't know that yin-yang sometimes symbolizes opposites compared to the "normal" yin-yang standards :)
    Dark-In-Light Featured By Owner Mar 4, 2011
    hehe yeah just full of odd and not so usefull info, thats what i am :p
    and you have good standards.. stick w/ them ^^
    cardossO Featured By Owner Feb 28, 2011
    you are amazing... you are my favorite now...
    DarkBowserJr Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2011
    Freaken amazing! Beautiful job!
    EmoTemo Featured By Owner Feb 16, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
    This is brilliant! :D :clap: you seem to be a very deep soul after watching this portrait and reading all that you've written 'bout it! :)
    LittleMissMagic73 Featured By Owner Feb 7, 2011
    omg this is amazing
    Shisho2k Featured By Owner Jan 30, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
    "No matter how secure someone may seem to be, there's always one person who can make you the most insecure and weakest person on the entire planet... And that person is you."

    Very true. I often kind of wonder about the old angel and devil metaphor, and I kind of wonder if it manifests this way internally because we have two brains trying to be one. The cool, calculating, rational left brain and the creative, caring, fun loving right brain. They can be at odds with each other and often times the left is way more objective than is comfortable.
    PhantomRose91 Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2011  Student General Artist
    People try their hardest to bring you down. But that's their way of making themselves feel powerful. In all honesty, those people are just cowards, afraid to accept you and open their minds up for the talent and beauty that you possess. I have had the same problems until I realized that nothing can stand in the way of success and happiness if you're willing to put your best foot forward.

    You are talented and can do probably anything you set your mind to. I haven't seen anyone that could draw as good as you without using technology. Pencil art is so misunderstood and overseen. Everyone looks for the digitally drawn stuff nowadays. Keep up the good work and don't let anything get you down ever again. :)
    Cataclysm-X Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2011  Professional Traditional Artist
    Thank you so much ~DanteXLeon :thanks: you are very right. It's a lesson I've learned through the years, about people who refuse to take a good look at themselves and think about their own lives, rather than trying to bring others down to make themselves feel better. There's no use in doing that anyway, since they will feel only worse afterwards.

    There are parts about my life people would never understand. But I'm not here to complain about my miseries, and celebrate the good sides of life instead (:
    PhantomRose91 Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2011  Student General Artist
    You're very welcome and you're right as well. Keep up the good work. Your art will always be amazing in my book :)
    Sakura-lies Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2011
    I love it. So real and true. I especially like the dialogue. :3
    shaunbusch Featured By Owner Jan 17, 2011
    sweeeeeet! is that you?
    TigressEye Featured By Owner Jan 8, 2011
    I feel exactly like this on a daily basis....
    SMaRTeST-aRTiST Featured By Owner Jan 2, 2011
    amazing detail, and such true words
    JMcAdam Featured By Owner Dec 21, 2010  Hobbyist Digital Artist
    you share your thoughts and feelings with touching honesty/openness. I can relate to what your wrote all too well, and I think its like you said, stay positive, believe in yourself, etc. Thank you for sharing :)
    ZoMg1010 Featured By Owner Dec 19, 2010
    I really love this! I think the best part is your evil self. I love how you drew her, so devious, and planning evil crap.
    Don't worry, this is least you're better at color pencils than most people (me included :sniff:)

    You're :#1:
    soulfulSIGHT Featured By Owner Dec 13, 2010  Student Traditional Artist
    I really like the idea :D and i love the good's wings :love:
    msdonnad Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2010
    don't put yourself down, you are a brilliant artist, wonderful work, an original concept but unique in perspective
    Add a Comment:


    Submitted on
    May 16, 2009
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